Friday, August 23, 2013

Where To Begin The Conversation

If the farmer you meet on FarmersOnly is anything like my my farmer you may find yourself staring at a very closed off conversation at first.

And what I mean by that...

The first conversation I had with my farmer after sending that first message went a little like this:

Me: "How was your day today?"

Farmer: "Good"

Me: "What did you do?"

Farmer: "Hayed"

Me: "Anything Else?"

Farmer: "Nope"

Really!? I mean where in the world was I supposed to go with that?

After about five very direct answers, and no reciprocation, I thought of the idea- I'll ask ten, you ask ten.

Basically what we did was I sent ten questions, he answered them a long with sending me ten back.

It may seem a little too simple, but in the beginning when you aren't really sure you are ready to give out your cell number, or meet in person, it really is the perfect place to start.

Because of these questions my farmer really opened up to me about tons of topics- and he actually got pretty good at typing too!

It's amazing how much you can learn about a person when you ask them ten questions every other day.

We talked quite a bit once we established this pattern because we were both excited to see one another's answers.

Don't be afraid to make them think outside the box either!

I asked everything from favorite color to greatest fears, dream vacations, and even what he thought the best qualities of his parents were. Music, strengths, weaknesses, ideal dates...

The thing about asking questions through the computer is that after awhile all walls seem to come down.

By the first time I met my husband on the exit ramp down the road from our home I felt like I knew every single part of him and being in his arms felt just right.

So, if you find yourself unsure of where to take the conversation I suggest the "I'll ask ten, you ask ten" method. And don't just ask the serious questions, ask silly questions. Ask what they love, what they hate. What they do on a Sunday afternoon off. Their favorite TV shows.

After weeks of only talking to my farmer this way- I really, truly felt like I knew him better than some of my closest friends.

Not to mention that if you talk and you learn to ask questions it's a habit that will continue through your relationship.

After 5 years of being together I still find us playing the "I'll ask ten, you ask ten" on long road trips.

And it's amazing after 5 years what you can still learn about one another!

Happy Conversing!






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