Monday, November 14, 2016

We are truly thankful that you have helped us feel so happy, thankful and complete.

REWIND to March 2014, I was working my second job with Baltimore County Crisis. It was a rainy Sunday night, the kind that you wish you were home under the covers watching Lifetime movies with pizza. I was feeling particularly defeated as I was tired from working two jobs, and was sad that I had decided to stop dating and move forward successfully alone. I made a call to my mother that night, and explained this decision to her. I let her know that I was sad and just wanted to accept that I don’t have “my other half” out there in the world. My 20’s were filled with unfortunately two terrible relationships, the dating scene in my 30’s was proving to be very limited as I attended wedding after wedding. My mom listened, was surprisingly silent on the other end of the line.

“Ma?! Why are you being so quiet?!” I ask. She does a long drawn out sigh before saying the following:

“Heidi, I'm so sad to hear all of this. I don’t want you to feel this way. I know in my heart there is someone out there for you. Why don’t you try farmersonly.com? Before you yell at me that you are not a farmer, you should take a look at the website to see that its people that like a certain lifestyle. It seems really down to earth. Just try it!”

I now let out a long drawn out sign.
“ugh mom. Really? I am not a farmer, I grew up in Baltimore City, and are you just trying to have me marry someone like dad?! Just, I cant.”
We go back and forth for a few minutes, before I reluctantly say, “fine, ill do it. But 1 to 2 months tops then I'm officially done!” I go ahead and sign up.

Fast forward to April 28, 2014. I receive an email from Shean. He seemed nice, but I wasn’t getting my hopes up. We exchange a few emails over the next couple weeks then decide we should talk over the phone. I didn’t sleep that night. Too much to think about. What if he has a high pitched voice? What if he says weird things? What if there are long pauses of silence. What if I don’t like him anymore after the phone call? What if he doesn’t line me after the call?! Then I am back to square one. Even though I told myself to not get my hopes up, I kind of did.

THE PHONE CALL WAS GOOD!! We talked while I drove to work, and he was running to the supply house for work. We were able to talk consistently for 45 minutes (the length of my commute). He sounded really nice, and down to earth. But again, I had to tell myself to get it together and eliminate all hopes. We talk everyday thereafter. Each conversation going better and better. We decide to meet on labor day weekend since I was able to take time off. Shean lived 2.5 hours away from me, so I needed to have extra time available to head his way. We also decided that since it was a far drive, I should stay for the weekend. I let him know kindly that I don’t know him and he could be a serial killer for all I know. He was amused by that, and reiterated that the Marine Corp didn’t think favorably of serial killers and that he wasn’t one. He did joke though that if we end up himtting it off, he’d have to chain me up in the basement so I didn’t leave and not come back after memorial weekend. A LITTLE TOO SOON SHEAN, A LITTLE too soon. But I did come to realize he has the same sense of dry, sarcastic humor I did.

Memorial Day 2014!
Let’s just say, I didn’t sleep the week leading up to Memorial Day weekend. I frantically put together outfits, drank lots of water, and did every beauty regiment that the industry recommended. Surprisingly, the 2.5 hour drive did not feel like 2.5 hours. I blinked, and I had arrived. I was so nervous walking up to his home! I thought I would roll my ankle and fall indefinitely. Thankfully, I did not!

Minutes later, he opened the door, smiled and acted like we had been friends forever. It was oddly pretty comfortable right away. The first night we decided we would make dinner and hang out on the deck. So we proceeded to go grocery shopping, grilled steaks for dinner and hung out outside most of the night!

The next day, he told me he wanted to stop by a friend’s cookout and to just throw some casual clothes on. Me, being a girl……..and well me. I freaked out! What is a casual outfit that I can wear to look effortlessly put together?! And I forgot my hair dryer! I opted for jean skirt and white button down with a ponytail. Oh well. We arrive to the cookout and there were a minimum of 50 people there…..with more to come. Needless to say I was overwhelmed and curded myself for thinking it would be a small group. I soon learned all of these people were his close friends. They were surprised I was there as Shean hadn’t dated anyone for 5 years. They of course asked how we met, and how long ago. Which Shean proudly said “ last night!!! And on farmersonly.com

We have been together ever since!
Shean and I are blessed to have found each other. We both come from very different backgrounds. I growing up in Baltimore City, and attending an all girls school with both parents being married to each other for 30+ years. I had a fairly normal upbringing, with the usual bickering with my brother.
I soon learned over the past 2+ years that Shean had a very challenging childhood/teen years. Both parents suffered from substance abuse and passed away early on in his life. He has a brother whom suffers from Autism and needs 24/7 care. He was fortunate to be able to be placed into a residential/day program where he is able to receive any and all care that he needs. We love visiting him and always bring some type of treat for the home and roommate’s where he lives. Shean learned early to be independent and take care of himself. Working in the restaurant industry in high school, and paying rent at 15 years old. He told me there were times he was homeless and broke, which led him to couch surfing or sleeping in his car. He also told me of times where he had to wrap him and his brothers Christmas presents because his parents were not in the right state to be able to do so.

THIS BREAKS MY HEART.
Later, in his 20’s, Shean decided to join the military. It was then he became a part of the Marine Corp. He was able to serve his country for 4 years and took two tours to IRAQ. At the end of his second tour he was blown off of a building. He encountered significant injuries landing him in a German hospital for 2 months in a coma. Unfortunately, after this, the Marines told him that he cannot continue for another 4 years due to his injuries. He was devastated, as the marine corp quickly because his foundation, family, life.

Luckily, once Shean returned home he was able to work with a friend that owned a window and door company then later joined the steamfitters union. Shean graduated in May 2016 and is now a fully operational mechanic for commercial HVAC services. I am so proud of him!
We are now engaged! It was official on May 24, 2016 in Harpers Ferry Md. We have been working on planning our wedding and building our life together. We have quickly learned the wedding process is VERY EXPENSIVE and are budgeting as best we can, since we will be paying for the wedding ourselves. I am writing to you farmersonly.com first and foremost to share our success story! In addition to seeing if you would want to sponsor a portion of our wedding? Even something like helping pay for decorations? In return we would promote farmersonly.com through signage in addition to facebook/Instagram etc.

Thank you for all that you do at farmersonly.com! We are truly thankful that you have helped us feel so happy, thankful and complete.

Heidi K.
MD

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